The Empty Schoolhouse: Reflections & Adventures of a Veteran Homeschool Mom

25 years ago Jim finally asked me to marry him. Finally. We had dated for over 2 years. I knew just 2wks in that he was the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. He was the one I want to marry & have children with. It took him a lil longer be ready for that commitment. But it all worked out in God's perfect timing. Tonight I watched the city fireworks. They had been postponed to tonight due to rain. It just seemed perfect. Jim loved fireworks. My heart didn't ache like other years. I felt held. Content. Maybe it is because the boys are grown. Many fears have been slain. I can see how God fathered them.  Don't get me wrong. I miss Jim. A part of me always will. Tears still fall sometimes.  But I remember when my 10th wedding anniversary came and how raw I felt.  I can see how much healing has come since then.  The Lord is good & faithful. He is the Lover of my soul and the Healer of my heart.  The Best Friend Who walks beside me and guides me on...

At least once a week:  I will feel like a complete failure. I will shed some tears when I get alone. I will forget to do something. I will be humbled. I will feel weak & old. The unexpected will happen. But also: Children will hug me when I arrive. They will ask me to read them a story, rub their back, or hold their hand. My director will encourage me. Coworkers will do simple acts of kindness. I will sweat and get in 10,000 steps every day and my body is strengthened. I have money to pay bills and get what is needed.  I am working where I feel the Lord would have me be for now. 

Bible reading notes: Ezra chapter 7: V6 ...he was a ready scribe ...the king granted him all his request , according to the hand of the LORD his God upon him. V9 ...according to the good hand of his God upon him. V10 For Ezra had prepared his heart to seek the law of the LORD, and to do it, and to teach it... V23 Whatsoever is commanded by the God of heaven, let it be diligently done... V26 And whatsoever will not do the law of thy God, and the law of the king, let judgment be executed speedily upon him, whether it be unto death, or to banishment, or to confiscation of goods, or to imprisonment. V28 I was strengthened as the hand of the LORD my God was upon me... Chapter 8 V16 men of understanding V18 by the g ood hand of our God upon us V21 I proclaimed a fast ...afflicted ourselves before our God, to seek Him a right way for us... V22 The hand of our God is u pon all them for good that seek Him ... V23 So we fasted and besought our God for this: and He was intreated of us . V28...

There is an old country song called "Life as We Knew It Ended Today."  That is how I have felt today. Not melancholy, just recognizing reality.  The end of an era is here.  I have been a SAHM (stay at home mom) since Nov of 2000. Twenty-four years is a long time, folks!  You know how some books are broken down into sections & then chapters? The book of motherhood started a new section when I became a widowed mom. And today I close the section on SAHM.  Monday I start working full-time outside the home again. I will always be a mom, but all my sons are adults. They need me just in different ways now. The Lord has provided this new job as a way to provide for me and grow me in this next chapter of life.  Today has felt like the last day of a vacation, soaking it all in knowing this time is ending, yet knowing a new duty is calling. I walked around the yard just enjoying the usual evening songs of our usual robin, cardinal, and wren, with occasional red-wi...

My youngest son graduated today! Several people have said to me that now I will become an empty nester. Actually, two of my sons still live at home, so I am not an empty nester just yet. But I will have an empty schoolhouse!  I began homeschooling back in 2003 when my oldest son was a preschooler. We began gently using  Before Five in a Row  and the wonderful companion books. These books and the ones used in Five in a Row  (FIAR)  became like dear friends as we continued to homeschool and more boys were born.  I have tried to remember how I first heard about the  FIAR  curriculum which has the parent read the same beloved children's book five days in a row and pulls out different elements each day: language, applied math, science, social studies, and art. Then it has activities with them. My most treasured memory of motherhood is having my sons surrounding me on the couch, snuggled in, and being captivated by a book that seemed to transport us to ...